Tuesday 29 July 2014

Sportsmen Crying - Liam Davie

A beautiful thing, Liam Davie crying at the Commonwealth men gymnastic team competition.  An example of strong men crying as a result of wanting something so much.  Apparently there is a 'rule' for men crying in sports, someone shake this guy who wrote this article!

http://uk.askmen.com/sports/fanatic_250/273_the-rules-for-crying-in-sports.html

Thankfully there is a clever man called Professor Cooper who has commented on the subject of sportsmen crying with a tad more insight:


"I think it was Gascoigne who reallyopened the way for other men to cry," said Cary Cooper, professor of organisational psychology and health at Lancaster University. "We know that men don't express their feelings as well as women. I think for men to cry in competitive, aggressive, macho sports like football is quite healthy.
"It's an expression of emotion and people aren't ashamed of doing it anymore. You're seeing a physical, outward manifestation of what someone is actually feeling inside, without disguising it and trying to play the part of a macho man. That's what I like about it, provided people don't start crying just because it's the done thing."
Professor Cooper, who as a Manchester City supporter clearly knows a thing or two about the subject, believes Britain has shown the way in the crying game. "Fifteen or 20 years ago we led pretty stable lives, a nine-to-five culture. Now we lead much more frenetic lives and people areso much more ambitious and achievement-driven. We've been Americanised. Everything is about winning.
"I think that has led us into feeling more pressure. And given the freneticway that we lead our lives we don't have time to express our emotions, until something goes wrong. Then we can't control it because it's overwhelming. It's like a pressure cooker. It just boils over."

Sunday 13 July 2014

The Quiet Man Suite Trailer

Wow... amazing film

'Catharsis' features a world where locking away feelings is easier than dealing with them. But when the pressure builds is an explosion of emotion inevitable?

'Catharsis' is one of six dance films that form The Quiet Man Suite.

http://boysdancing.org/gallery/catharsis

Thursday 10 July 2014

A word to men who hide

Hey there open your eyes it's lovely to see you.
You've been gone from my side, I thought that I'd lost you
Gone from my side, gone from side

You've been lost in the rain, again and again
I just wait in the sun, calling you red, run, run, run towards the sun

Standing outside with the sun in our eyes we blinded
Sense with the skin,
Feel the warmth rushing in,
This is real, real, real
Nowhere to hide

You're strong
Don't tell me I'm wrong
Don't hide

Boys Don't Cry

I found this fab article about men not crying:

http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/10/12/why-is-it-so-hard-for-men-to-cry/http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/10/12/why-is-it-so-hard-for-men-to-cry/

What I found more interesting was one man's response to this about childishness and how as adults we should 'abandon the weak surrender to sadness'.  He then goes on to talk about how as adults, 'We feel the distress just as much as when we were children, but we do not surrender and submit to the shame of tears.'

I found this really poignant and revealing  - I wonder does he feel that all feelings of sadness are related to weakness and that as adults we should ignore all of these feelings?

I find his words reminiscent of my own feelings towards crying in front of people, I hate people to see me as weak and crying.  But that in itself is about me - I think that people will see me as weak - when perhaps the reality is that by not crying - by not letting it out and being truthful with myself in a moment - I am being weak by stifling the feelings that are arising.

Wednesday 2 July 2014

The Guardian - Young men in crisis

Boys don't cry, or at least they're not supposed to. Yes, the old, unreconstructed machismo that was once all too synonymous with being a man has been partly driven back; men are more likely to open up and talk about their feelings. But discussing anxiety, depression and mental distress is still seen as weak or unmanly; the pressure to "man up" and "stop being such a woman" remains pervasive. And let's be frank: these expectations are killing all too many men.

http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/jul/02/young-men-mental-health-crisis-support-cuts?CMP=fb_ot